Do We Really Want a PC Christmas?

Let’s start by sharing a level playing field here. I fully realize that PC means different things to different people. For that reason, I “googled” PC to be safe. To my surprise, I found 188 separate definitions … far more than I ever anticipated!

However, for the purpose of this piece I want to focus on one definition. While Personal Computer may first come to mind … let’s discuss “Politically Correct” for a moment.

For the past week, our Washington politicians have looked more like chameleons than lawmakers. To protect their own careers, the majority of them are moving to positions they feel will garner them votes in the future … regardless of political affiliation, past beliefs, or what’s best for the nation.

While it’s shameful to witness on both sides of the aisle, something must be done about it before it’s too late. The last few weeks of 2010 are going to be very interesting to watch and critical to the future of our country.

A critical aside to this unfolding drama lies in the harsh reality that Political Correctness must be diminished before it spreads like an aggressive cancer into every aspect of our lives.

Here’s a perfect example of what I mean. We’ve all heard and grown to love the traditional classic The Night Before Christmas. Many have even committed it to memory after having recited it or enjoyed hearing it year after year.

If things don’t change, you may very well have to learn the Politically Correct version of this classic—which may be a bit more difficult to recite and much less enchanting to hear. What do you think?

A Politically Correct Christmas Poem

Twas the night before Christmas and Santa’s a wreck …
How to live in a world that’s politically correct?
His workers no longer would answer to “Elves”,
“Vertically Challenged” they were calling themselves.
And labor conditions at the North Pole,
were alleged by the union, to stifle the soul.

Four reindeer had vanished without much propriety,
released to the wilds, by the Humane Society.
And equal employment had made it quite clear,
that Santa had better not use just reindeer.
So Dancer and Donner, Comet and Cupid,
were replaced with 4 pigs, and you know that looked stupid!

The runners had been removed from his beautiful sleigh,
because the ruts were deemed dangerous by the EPA,
And millions of people were calling the Cops,
when they heard sled noises upon their roof tops.
Second-hand smoke from his pipe, had his workers quite frightened,
and his fur trimmed red suit was called “unenlightened”.

To show you the strangeness of today’s ebbs and flows,
Rudolf was suing over unauthorized use of his nose.
He went to Geraldo, in front of the Nation,
demanding millions in over-due workers compensation.

So … half of the reindeer were gone, and his wife
who suddenly said she’d had enough of this life,
joined a self help group, packed and left in a whiz,
demanding from now on that her title was Ms.

And as for gifts … why, he’d never had the notion
that making a choice could cause such commotion.
Nothing of leather, nothing of fur …
Which meant nothing for him or nothing for her.
Nothing to aim, Nothing to shoot,
Nothing that clamored or made lots of noise.
Nothing for just girls and nothing for just boys.
Nothing that claimed to be gender specific,
Nothing that’s warlike or non-pacifistic.

No candy or sweets … they were bad for the tooth.
Nothing that seemed to embellish upon the truth.
And fairy tales … while not yet forbidden,
were like Ken and Barbie, better off hidden,
for they raised the hackles of those psychological,
who claimed the only good gift was one ecological.

No baseball, no football… someone might get hurt,
besides – playing sports exposed kids to dirt.
Dolls were said to be sexist and should be passe.
and Nintendo would rot your entire brain away.

So Santa just stood there, disheveled and perplexed,
he just couldn’t figure out what to do next?
He tried to be merry he tried to be gay,
but you must have to admit he was having a very bad day.
His sack was quite empty, it was flat on the ground,
nothing fully acceptable was anywhere to be found.

Something special was needed, a gift that he might,
give to us all, without angering the left or the right.
A gift that would satisfy—with no indecision,
each group of people in every religion.
Every race, every hue,
everyone, everywhere … even you!
So here is that gift, it’s price beyond worth …


About Harry K. Jones

Harry K. Jones is a motivational speaker and consultant for AchieveMax®, Inc., a company of professional speakers who provide custom-designed seminars, keynote presentations, and consulting services. Harry's top requested topics include change management, customer service, creativity, employee retention, goal setting, leadership, stress management, teamwork, and time management. For more information on Harry's presentations, please call 800-886-2629 or fill out our contact form.

One thought on “Do We Really Want a PC Christmas?

  1. Merry Christmas Harry!!!

    Thank you for allowing us to laugh when sometimes we wanted to cry and see the craziness of life.


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